Nervous Is An Understatement

I'm getting really nervous for Brady to come home. Like extremely nervous.

All I want to do is cry. And it makes me shake and feel panic. I'm just getting so restless in the night. It's literally taking over me. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm really excited to see him. In fact, the crying part is because I can't believe this is almost over. This waiting is almost over. It's almost my turn to write a success story. It's almost my turn to be with the one I love again. A lot of the crying too, is because I just love him so much.

I still have doubt run through my mind, and that's why I'm getting nervous. I'm freaking out, and I have thoughts of "what if it doesn't work out?" "what if I don't get to see him for a few days after he gets back because he has to be with his family?" just a bunch of silly things, and I pray and pray and PRAY that I'll be comforted and that I can do this. I can make it to the very end. Ah, just makes me want to scream. makes me shiver and just close my eyes real tight. i'm so nervous.

I just want to cry and hug him. Someone please pinch me. Someone please pinch me. This can't be real. It can't really be my turn now. I feel like this is all a dream, like this is all made up. It can't be my real life.

I'm just nervous. I can't say it enough. I want to see him at the airport. I want to hug the crap out of him. I want to hold his hand and never let it go for the next..... infinity years. I don't want to leave his side, but he will prolly have to be set apart and then eat thanksgiving dinner with his family. But honestly, I don't care. I don't care if I just have to walk around like an awkward, extra person, just hanging with his family until I can snatch that hand in mind, and hold on forever, just like we did when we first met. I want to spend every living and breathing second of that weekend with him. I specifically asked for it off so him and I could spend time getting to know each other again.. so I'm just hoping that everything will turn out okay.

ah. i don't even really know what I'm saying right now.
I'm just nervous. and I can't say it enough.
makes me want to cry.
i get to see my sweetheart again you guys!!!!
I get to hug him.
I get to be with him.
i get to cry.
i get to stop waiting.
it'll all be over.
all my worries, hurt and hard times will not be faced alone.
I can share so much of my life with him.
FINALLY!!!
what a blessing.
i'm so lucky.
i'm so grateful.
he's mine.
omg.
i get to see him soon.
70 days.
ahhh.
i'm gonna go cry now.
thanks for reading.
if you did at all.
♥